Sunday, August 10, 2008

KC - Easy Sunday

KC's recommended reading for an Easy Sunday Morning...

The Laws of Physics for Cats
(Author Unknown)

  1. Acceleration: A cat will accelerate at a constant rate until the cat gets good and ready to stop.
  2. Aerodynamics: If it flies, a cat will chase it.
  3. Bag or Box Occupancy: All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.
  4. Dinner Table Attendance: A cat will attend all meals when anything good is served.
  5. Disinterest: A cat's interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to interest the cat.
  6. Electric Blanket Attraction: Turn on an electric blanket and a cat will jump into bed at the speed of light.
  7. Elongation: A cat can make its body long enough to reach just about any counter top that has anything remotely interesting on it.
  8. Embarrassment: A cat's irritation rises in direct proportion to the cat's embarrassment times the amount of human laughter.
  9. Energy Conservation - 1st Law: A cat knows that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will therefore use as little energy as possible.
  10. Energy Conservation- 2nd Law: A cat knows that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping.
  11. Fluid Displacement: A cat immersed in milk will displace its own volume, minus the amount of milk consumed.
  12. Furniture Replacement: A cat's desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.
  13. Gravity: The cat knows that gravity works, even when sound asleep.
  14. Inertia: A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food or a nearby scurrying mouse.
  15. Landing: A cat will always land in the softest place possible.
  16. Magnetism: All blue blazers and black sweaters attract cat hair in direct proportion to the darkness of the fabric.
  17. Milk Consumption: A cat will drink its weight in milk, squared, just to show you that the cat can do it.
  18. Motion: A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.
  19. Obedience Resistance: A cat's resistance varies in direct proportion to a human's desire for the cat to do something.
  20. Obstruction: A cat will lay on the floor in such a position as to obstruct the maximum amount of human foot traffic.
  21. Pill Rejection: Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.
  22. Random Comfort Seeking: A cat will always seek (and usually take over) the most comfortable spot in any given room.
  23. Refrigerator Observation: If a cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat.
  24. Rug Configuration: No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long.
  25. Sleeping: A cat will sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved as possible, while maintaining the cat's own comfort.
  26. Stretching: A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap just taken.
  27. Thermodynamics: Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, in which case all heat flows to the cat.
  28. Total Composition: A cat is composed of Matter plus Anti-Matter plus It Doesn't Matter!
  29. Selective Listening: A cat can hear a can of tuna being opened a mile away, but cannot hear a simple command three feet away.
  30. Invisibility: A cat thinks if they cannot see you, then you cannot see them.

KC demonstrates the 14th Law of Cat Physics: Inertia


Emma's Kat said...

Love "The Laws", lol! So true! And KC, my look so purrdy showing us those beautiful green eyes. And tell your meowmie she must give that sweet tummy a snorgle for us! :)

Hugs & scritches,

DKM said...

May I snorgle that Tortie Tum KC? PLEEAASSEEEEE

Moki said...

We love the kitty "laws!"

caspersmom said...

Those are great pictures of you KC. You sure are the intellectual type with your laws. You ought to enter the Monty Q contest with that last picture. Or is that over with??? Anyhow you have a great stretch there.


topcatrules said...

We like your laws. :)

We think cats should be allowed to go where ever they like... in the house. You should see little Pye up on the hutch playing with the little Limoge ornaments. :)

Cheysuli and gemini said...

I think that was brilliant!!!

Grr, Midnight & Cocoa said...

those are really excellent! and our Lady's in line for snorgling too.

Marilynn said...

Fantastic!! How perfect these laws are!

I especially like #8 -- that used to be so true for Indy and Pluto. I haven't seen Grace & Company do too many things that bring on embarrassment yet, but I'm sure I will as time goes on. They're pretty young yet!


Marilynn, Grace & Company

The Island Cats said...

Hahahaha!! Those were excellent laws of physics! We 'specially like #s 20, 22 and 25! Happy Sunday!

Wally, Ernie & Zoey

Parker said...

That was wonderful!
KC - your tummy is so rubbable!

Gandalf and Grayson said...

Oh, this is an excellent list. Do you have this in poster size? Our favorite is the Law of Invisibility! We also think that there should be a Law of Sound - if the cat cannot hear you, you aren't saying anything important.

Asta said...

I got so tiwed fwom all that weading, thatI think I'll take a nap now
smoochie kisses

Lux said...

All so very true. :)

The Taylor CatSSSSS said...

Purrfect posting! Can I come and snorgle that sweet tummy???

Love, Auntie Deb

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